


The Thief Who Wasn't Good At Taking Things, And The Burglar Who Stole His Heart

by Bam4Me



Series: The Unexpected Additions [1]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Battle of Five Armies - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Battle of Five Armies Fix-It, Bilbo And Nori Were married Before The Book/Movie Eevents, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, First Chapter Is How They Got Together, Fix-It, Gen, M/M, Second One Follows Movie Events, Secret Marriage, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-06-02 01:11:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6544342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bam4Me/pseuds/Bam4Me
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bilbo Baggins was an enigma to any dwarf who met him, which made the dwarves around him wonder, how the hell he'd roped one into a marriage. They mostly just assume at first, that Nori just be a little broken.</p><p>They're wrong. Both Nori and Bilbo are broth a bit broken, but together, it's not as bad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Thief Who Wasn't Good At Taking Things, And The Burglar Who Stole His Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, that summery made it sound a little angsty, don't worry, this is gonna be a gay journey of happy feels all over.
> 
> BTW, the original prompt for this I found on a Hobbit Kink Meme, but I can't remember the link, because it was SO LONG AGO that I found it, so if anyone knows it, please, I would love a link to it.
> 
> My trash blog: littlesforfandom.tumblr.com

See, this wasn’t how this night was supposed to go. Nori wasn’t supposed to be in the Shire long anyways. Hobbits were all kind of suspicious about dwarves, he was just supposed to sneak in, undercover of night, get into the biggest hobbit hole he could find there, and get out with as much money as he could find.

 

This is a deviation from his original plan.

 

See, he didn’t do crying. His other brothers? They cried. Dori was a constant worry wart about his little brothers, and could get upset at the most amazing things. It didn’t matter that he was damn near the strongest dwarf to live, no no, he was a sap and a fool. Well, Nori thought him a fool.

 

Ori though… Ori was just a wee thing, he’d cling to his older brothers like a limpet, and got tearful at the slightest things.

 

Nori doesn’t understand why they can’t just… close themselves off. Act like nothing was wrong when it so obviously was, and keep going. He never cried, or, at least, he tried not to, but, hearing his brothers cry, that got to him sometimes.

 

Crying was not a part of his plan.

 

He could hear it though, in the big empty hobbit hole, far too drafty for a home so big that looked like it should have held children and parents alike. He frowned, coming closer to the hallway where he could hear it. It was a male, by the tone of its voice, he thought, and that just made things worse, making him think of little Ori, when he cried sometimes at night after a hard day, trying to be quiet though so no one heard him.

 

Of course, there wasn’t supposed to be anyone here to hear him at all, and so these were loud sobs. Painful ones, the ones that you’re just so frustrated at holding back so constantly, they just come out like a waterfall.

 

No, they sounded more like the cries that Nori let out when he allowed them. That just made his heart wrench more.

 

Nori wasn’t sure how long he stood there, wrapped up in the painful memories of his own life, until he heard a voice accompany his own thoughts.

 

“W-who are you? What are you doing here?”

 

Nori blanched, suddenly realizing that he was… in the middle of a hobbit hole… caught by the owner of the hobbit hole, that he was trying to steal from.

 

The tiny hobbit in front of him, was young, with big blue eyes, wet from crying and red rimmed in a way that looked painful. He had tear tracks on his face and was shaking a little, though, from fear or something else, Nori did not know. He looked like a scared young dwarrow did, one who knows they’re about to get in trouble, but is trying not to let it show just how upset about it they are.

 

“I-“

 

The small hobbit –and he was small, probably a foot and a half shorter than him at least, if not more, though he was kind of chubby by dwarf standards- looked around him, to see the empty black bag sitting over his arm, before raising an eyebrow. When he looked Nori in the face again, there was a look of disbelief in his eyes. “You came to rob me?”

 

Nori stood there, dumbly. He’s pretty sure that he’s never been this foolish on a heist before, and isn’t sure why he’s not just making a run for the window he’d climbed through. He’s pretty sure the little hobbit wouldn’t follow him anyways. He looked like he’d been through the ringer, and let out a tiny sniffle when Nori didn’t answer him, just slowly turning red. “You’re not a very good thief.”

 

Nori bristled at that, “I am! I just got distracted by your wailing and wondered if I’d stumbled into a widow’s home!”

 

To a dwarf, those words would have been cutting, and probably enough to send the boy into tears again so that Nori could make his escape, but the hobbit just sniffled again, nose scrunching up cutely before he sighed, arms coming up in a shrug and turning away. “I don’t care, take whatever, just leave me here to rot.”

 

He turned and went into another room, a slightly brighter one this time, and Nori just stared after him in shock.

 

Nori thought about doing just as the hobbit had asked, vindictively, but stopped short, instead thinking of leaving.

 

Another sniffle coming from the other room stopped him. He sighed, stomping into the kitchen with a glare. “Why are you crying?”

 

The hobbit shrugged, “Maybe because a stupid dwarf just came into my home to steal things, and now he’s all upset with me for some reason. I don’t much like stupid dwarves.”

 

Nori glared at the hobbit’s back, “You were crying before I came in.”

 

The hobbit ignored him for a few minutes while he set a kettle over the fire and put things out on the small table. Breads, butter, jam, and… two small tea cups? Two plates of food…

 

“Don’t look _so_ surprised. I figured if you weren’t going to kill me, and have decided not to steal my things, I might as well be nice back.”

 

Nori’s eyes narrowed, but he sighed again, sitting across from the little hobbit. “Hobbits are weird. If you were a dwarf, you’d have knocked my teeth in by now. Your survival skills are awful. Or non-existent.”

 

Bilbo buttered a scone with a raised eyebrow, “If I did that, your teeth would break my hand first.”

 

Nori nodded, reaching out for a biscuit, not mentioning how the hobbit didn’t argue about his survival skills. “It would.”

 

The hobbit sniffled, “Who are you? Also, why were you stealing from me?”

 

Nori sighed, leaning on one hand as he picked at the treats on his plate. “Nori, at your service, I’ve been told I’m an awful person, if that’s reason enough.”

 

He snorted at that, getting back up to take the kettle off the fire and pour it into the teapot. “Lobelia Bracegirdle says I’m an awful person, but I get the feeling it has more to do with me having things she doesn’t, than her actually thinking I’m awful.”

 

Nori raised an eyebrow, “Well, I steal things for a living, so-“

 

“That doesn’t make you a bad person. A bad person would have knocked me out and taken what they came for anyways. I _assume_ you have an actual reason to steal if that’s how you get by.”

 

Nori narrowed his eyes again, “Why were you crying?”

 

“Why were you stealing my things?”

 

“I have two brothers to support at home. I can’t find any other work that will support them.”

 

The hobbit nodded, “That is a good reason.”

 

Nori frowned, “Do you have a good reason for crying?”

 

The hobbit paused, “…my mother died on this day, a long while ago. I miss her.”

 

Nori nodded, “That’s also a very good reason.”

 

The hobbit nodded, “I’m glad you think so.”

 

***

 

The hobbit was named Bilbo. He was thirty-five years old, and apparently, for hobbits, that was two years past his coming of age.

 

And, he was all alone in a house, built by his father, in hopes that him and his wife would have many children. They had one, and then they died, leaving Bilbo all alone there, with nothing to hear but the sounds of his own crying.

 

Nori felt bad for him. Even when things got bad for him, he always had his brothers, even if they usually did end up crying all over him half the time.

 

Though, Bilbo had big tear tracks on his face, and he looked upset for hours after Nori had met him, till the dwarf had guided the hobbit back into the room he’d been crying in, and tucked him into the soft bed there. They had mostly spent the entire time asking each other questions they knew would make the other one uncomfortable, is a battle of wits and spite, it was almost like they couldn’t decide if they liked or hated each other. Bilbo had looked so tired, Nori wondered if he’d even remember his late night visitor the next morning.

 

When Nori himself left though, he didn’t take anything –well, anything of value, he did raid the hobbit’s pantry, but that was more of a compensation than anything- but he did leave behind a small bead on the table beside Bilbo’s bed. It had the crest for the house of the brother’s Ri. Nori wasn’t sure why he did that part, it just felt like the thing to do at the time.

 

***

 

The next time Nori was in the Shire, it was slightly more desperate than the first.

 

He slid through the same window in Bag End as he had the last time, and immediately knocked over a side table that clattered against the floor, not breaking, but making a loud crack of noise. He winced immediately, holding his breath for a moment before letting it back out when he didn’t hear anything around him, no movement.

 

Until-

 

“You came back.”

 

Nori looked at the opening to the sitting room, blinking in wonder at how the hobbit could possibly move so silently as he did. “You redecorated.”

 

The hobbit nodded once. He looked more rested than he had the last time Nori was there, and his cheeks were free of any tear tracks. Good. Nori hates crying.

 

“I’m not stupid. Obviously, that window is a good entrance for a burglar.”

 

Nori nodded once, “Last time you weren’t very worried about if a burglar actually took anything.”

 

Bilbo shrugged, “Well, this time I am. What did you come back for? The bead? It’s a pretty thing, I’m sure it’s worth a bit. I’ll go get it for-”

 

“No!” Bilbo stopped midsentence, startled, “I- I mean, no. You keep it, I left it for you. Show it to any dwarf from the Blue Mountains and they’ll take you to the Brother’s Ri if you need them. But…”

 

Bilbo nodded, wide eyed, “Yes?”

 

Nori hated crying more than anything in this world. He hated it so badly.

 

Nori wanted to cry. “I… I know I shouldn’t ask of you-”

 

The hobbit rolled his eyes, “Just get on with it. You’re not the first person who shouldn’t, but _will_. Though, you are the first that’s not a hobbit.”

 

Nori nodded, shoulders squaring up, as if getting ready for a blow. “My younger brother is sick. I’m barely able to help feed and clothe him and my older brother, we cannot afford a healer.”

 

Bilbo’s eyes were wet as well. Nori had the sneaking suspicion that he might have hit a nerve, and possibly figured out how he’d lost one or both of his own parents. “Do you know what ails him?”

 

Nori frowned, head shaking, “He has a fever that won’t subside. Coughing constantly. He says it feels so bad he’d rather be dead sometimes. His head hurts, and he needs to blow his nose all the time.”

 

Bilbo’s eyebrows furrowed. “I… I’m not sure if it’s just because hobbit’s have so many healers, but that sounds like a common springtime ailment.”

 

Nori’s eyes went wide. “Dwarves do not often get sick at all! Our healers say they don’t know what to do, I was hoping to get a better one, to figure out what was wrong with him. If it’s a common ailment, will it go away?”

 

Bilbo shook his head, “Not without medicine, but you’re in the Shire, if there’s one thing we have in abundance, it’s herbs. Wait here, I’ll get the Gaffer. He specializes in growing, and his wife makes medicine. They should know what to give him.”

 

Bilbo left the room without another word, and Nori could hear the front door opening and closing after a few minutes. He looked around. Now that Bilbo had left holding the candle he’d had in his hands, it was dark. Though, he followed the dull light in the smial again until he found himself back at the kitchen he’d sat in with Bilbo before. The fire in the hearth was still going and it was a warmer place than the rest of the house.

 

He sat down, staring into the flames until the door came open again.

 

“Noir?”

 

Nori cleared his throat. “I’m in the kitchen!”

 

When he came into the room, he had two others with him, looking just a little sheepish. The woman didn’t even flinch though, coming over to the table with a satchel in her hands. “You say he has liquid in his chest?”

 

She opened up the bag, rifling through it and pulling out some bottles. Nori nodded. “Yes. His chest is filled with it, and he coughs it up constantly.”

 

She nodded, “The men, they call this pneumonia. They’re not nearly as good as hobbits at curing it, but they do have a name for it. We just call it a springtime sickness. How strong is your brother, without being sick? How well is his health?”

 

Nori’s mouth shut with a clack. “Um… well? I believe he’s got very strong health. The sickness took up all by surprise.”

 

She nodded, “It should, it’s not a common ailment for dwarves. If he has strong health normally, you shouldn’t worry about it killing him.” She shoved three bottles at him. “The herb is to be made into a tea, the paste should be thinly applied to his chest when he has trouble breathing, and the liquid should be heated, and the fumes inhaled. He should be well within a week.”

  


Nori looked at the bottles in shock, unsure what to say. Finally, he grabbed all three, placing them with gentle care into his satchel, still shocked. “I… what do I owe you?”

 

She smiled gently. “Nothing dear, just get home and fix your boy up. Master Baggins has already offered payment for it.”

 

Nori looked at Bilbo with wide eyes, suddenly noticing the hobbit was doing something in his pantry. “I-”

 

Bilbo shook his head, turning just enough for Nori to see he was packing food into a cloth bag. “Don’t argue. I won’t hear it. I assume you’ll be leaving tonight as well?”

 

Nori nodded, “Yes, I would like him well as soon as possible.”

 

Bilbo nodded, closing the cloth bag up once it was full, and shoving it at the dwarf. “Well then, as soon as you’re ready, off you pop.”

 

Nori couldn’t help but smile at the gentlehobbit. How his own race could be so distant, and sometimes, cruel, towards their own kind, he’d never know, but he did know one thing; he’d wasn’t ever going to try and steal from a hobbit again. They’d probably just shake it off with a kind smile anyways, assuming he had needed whatever he took from them anyways.

 

They -at least, the one’s he’d met- were far too kind to him when he didn’t deserve it.

 

He left that night again, this time with a pony, since the Shire was a day’s ride from the Blue Mountain, another thing that the hobbits had given him without him even asking for it.

 

His last parting words with the hobbit -his hobbit, this one had been. Maybe it was presumptuous to think of him as his,- were the blonde haired male, asking him to come back when his brother was better, to tell them.

 

The hobbit hadn’t said _if_ he got better, he said _when_ , and that itself had filled Nori up with new hope for seeing his brother up and smiling again.

 

***

 

Dori had accepted the medicine with a quiet and intent nature, following Nori’s instructions to a tee, and only when their brother was sleeping again, did he finally question him.

 

“How did you get it?”

 

Nori was almost proud to say, for the first time in his life, it wasn’t a lie what he said, “It was given to me.”

 

Dori snorted, looking like he didn’t believe a word of it, “If you-”

 

Nori shook his head, “For once, I don’t lie, brother. A kind, gentlehobbit, gave it to me.”

 

Dori frowned. “How do you know a _kind gentlehobbit_?”

 

Nori cringed at that. “I…” He didn’t know what to say about that, and sighed. “Dori, just believe me, I don’t lie this time. Apparently, for hobbits, this is a common springtime ailment. They have medicine for it in abundance. I told the hobbit of my need, and he gave without asking anything in return. I _will_ repay him one day, even if I don’t know how, but I do not lie for once.”

 

Dori studied his brother’s face intently. “If this is true, the Brother’s Ri owe him a life dept.”

 

Nori nodded, “I will repay it on my own, brother, you do not have-”

 

Dori shook his head, “I do, and I will. Whatever this hobbit requires of us, I will find a way to give to him.”

 

Nori nodded, looking tired and wary. He’d ridden as long as the pony would allow him to, and felt a bone deep tiredness in him. “He’s asked me to come back when Ori is well again. To tell him about it, he said.” He shrugged, “Besides, I have to take them back the pony.”

 

***

 

The next time Bilbo and Nori met, Nori couldn’t hold back a smile at the sight of him. “So, he’s well, then?”

 

What Nori did next, shocked them both. He had to lean quite a ways downward, but he pulled the hobbit to his chest, best as he could, voice sounding rough when he said, “I and my brothers owe you a life debt. I do not think anything I could ever do would repay you enough to show my gratitude, but you deserve so much more than that. You’ve brought a light back into my life, and my older brother’s eyes. Thank you.”

 

The hobbit was shocked still for a few seconds, before slowly melting into the embrace. For once, it was day, and they both stood in the front of Bag End, in the bright garden. Nori had just gotten back from returning the borrowed pony. Nori could feel his lips against his collarbone as the hobbit replied, he was so tightly pressed against his body. “You owe me nothing.”

 

Nori pulled back with a frown, before suddenly remembering that hobbit customs may not be the same as dwarves. “Master Hobbit, I know it’s not the same here, but for dwarves, when a life is saved-”

 

“A life should be returned.”

 

Nori paused. “Do you also have this custom here?”

 

The hobbit shook his head, “No. A life saved here, is a good deed done, and a duty to your fellow hobbits if you can do it. It’s considered a shame if someone were to ignore that. But that’s not why you owe me nothing. You owe me nothing, because giving you the means to save your brother, was _my_ way of saying thank you, for saving _me_.”

 

Nori frowned, “I never-”

 

“You did.” Bilbo looked away, ears turning a little red. “I know, I should have been mad at you that night, not… well… anyways, before you had shown up, I had seriously thought about ending my own life, but then you were there. The next morning came, and I found, I had no such urge anymore. I owed you more than I could ever hope for, and I only hope this is enough for now, but… I would wish to be your friend if I could. Friends help each other without any expectation of anything in return. I wish that now.”

 

And that, for the first time in Nori’s one hundred and ten years of life, was the first time, he ever thought he might have a One after all. Only issue is, he’s been looking in all the wrong places up till now.

 

***

 

Nori had a plan. It was a great plan. In fact, it was the most amazing plan in the world.

 

His brothers thought, like all his other plans, that it was a stupid plan.

 

“You want… to woo the tiny gentlehobbit?”

 

Nori gave a gentle sigh at the mere thought of him, because he was a giant sap, and the little hobbit had firmly planted himself in his heart before he’d even known he’d let him in.

 

Maybe his hobbit was a burglar as well.

 

“Oh Mahal, he’s got that stupid look on his face again, Dori, do something, he’s making me feel nauseous.”

 

Ori snickered as Fili and Kili immediately started squabbling again. The three of them were close in age, so it made sense that the three of them would be friends, and he liked them. They annoyed his big brothers.

 

“So, is there gonna be a hobbit wedding? I hear they make good cake.”

 

Nori looked thoughtful. Would he ask the hobbit to move in with him? No, Bilbo did quite like his house he’d told him. And Dori and Ori liked it here in the Blue Mountains. Maybe Nori would be able to move between the places. He liked moving around.

 

“I have to ask him to marry me first. But before that, I have to woo him.”

 

“How do you woo a hobbit?”

 

Nori shrugged, “They like flowers, right?”

 

The others shrugged, and he just sighed. Dori got up from his spot and motioned for Nori to follow him. “I know you said he doesn’t owe us a dept anymore, but I still feel the need to show my gratitude to him for what he’s done. At the very least, I believe it’s something a hobbit would like.”

 

Nori grinned at the object, nodding. “It’s perfect. Very pretty, I think he likes pretty things.”

 

***

 

Bilbo had liked the gift. It was quite beautiful. “It’s so lovely. Does your brother make them?”

 

Nori shook his head as he watched the hobbit inspect the ornate teapot with delicate fingers. It was made for a dwarf, so it was a bit bigger than a hobbit teapot, but Bilbo had already proven himself quite strong for a hobbit, with that big kettle of his, so he thought it’d be okay. It had a bunch of delicately painted flowers on it, and the design was beautiful, but very practical. “No, he doesn’t make them, but he owns a tea shop. He used to paint and fire teapots after they got to the store, but he doesn’t much anymore, since he fancies working with other things now.”

 

Bilbo looked positively charmed. “It’s so beautiful. Thank you. Tell your brother that I adore it.”

 

Nori nodded, “I will.”

 

He stayed for a whole two days that time.

 

He fixed the plumbing in one of the bathrooms, and helped one of Bilbo’s neighbors in removing a heavy tree stump from the ground, when the hobbit had taken him with him down to the market that morning.

 

He quite liked it there in the Shire.

 

***

 

The next time the dwarf had been by, he’d come through the front door again.

 

“Are those flowers for me?”

 

Bilbo was looking at the bouquet with slight concern on his face, and it made Nori’s smile falter. The men at the market had assured him these would be amazing flowers for wooing a hobbit. “I… yes?”

 

Bilbo looked up at him with big eyes. “Master Dwarf, are you trying to _woo_ me?”

 

Nori grinned, false bravado coming forth to help him out, “That depends, Master Hobbit, is it working?”

 

The hobbit grinned back, a shy blush of pink rising in his cheeks. “Aye, it might be.”

 

Nori gave a more real grin this time, relieved, “Then yes, I fancy that I just might be.”

 

***

 

“You know, you _are_ allowed to use the front door, Master Dwarf.”

 

Nori grinned down at the hobbit, kicking another rock past the tree line to the forest. “I think it’s quite peaceful out here, don’t you?”

 

Bilbo snorted, “It’s quite hot out today, and I’m afraid I do not have the same protection to my skin that a dwarf does. If I stay out too long, my skin will be red as a rose.”

 

Nori grinned, following Bilbo back to the smail. “I think you would look lovely with red skin.”

 

Bilbo smiled just a little bit, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”

 

Nori nodded, “And when I behold you, your beauty still astounds me.”

 

Bilbo rolled his eyes, “You flatter in all the wrong ways.”

 

“Not the first time someone has told me that.”

 

“I don’t doubt that.”

 

***

 

“Mister Baggins! Where is that dwarf of yours!”

 

Bilbo shared a disgruntled look with the Gaffer. Lobelia Bracegirdle was storming up the walkway, looking upset about something as usual. Bilbo frowned at her. “He’s not _my_ dwarf-”

 

She rolled her eyes, no qualms whatsoever about cutting him off. “Of course he is, Bilbo. He’s been wooing you for half a year now. About time you just put him out of his misery and take him to bed already-”

 

“Lobelia!”

 

She rolled her eyes harder, “Oh, Bilbo, don’t be such a prude. Not like someone with both your genders _needs_ to wait till the wedding. No one would be any the wiser. Anyways, where is he?”

 

Bilbo crossed his arms with a pout -though he’d deny it was a pout. “How do you even know he’s here?”

 

“Because late last night a drunken dwarf was stopped by the pond in town when he got lost and sent up to your smial to sleep it off. I assume it’s your dwarf, otherwise there might be a new scandal for people to gossip about. Not like you don’t have enough already.”

 

Bilbo rolled his own eyes. Yes, he quite liked Nori, and they _had_ been courting for a while now, but he had thought they’d been quiet about it. Nowadays, hobbits didn’t even startle at seeing the dwarf there with him, and they were quite friendly towards him. Apparently, Nori’s brother’s didn’t believe that in the slightest.

 

“He’s in the smail. Apparently, the sun hurts his eyes.”

 

She gave a slight smirk, and it just made Bilbo frown harder. “Why do you need him?”

 

She shrugged. Lobelia was a good person, if a bit loud and pushy. She and Bilbo used to get along quite well, and he could still easily see why they had once been such close friends, most days. “I don’t.”

 

Bilbo got a slow smirk on his own face, making her cringe. “Ohhh, you wanted to make sure he was _okay_ . Aww, Lobelia _cares_.”

 

She scowled, “I do _not_ , you ingrate!”

 

Bilbo snickered though, “Lobelia has a _heart_. It’s almost a miracle, to be honest.”

 

She just rolled her eyes again, and started off down the hill again. “You’re a menace to the Shire, Bilbo. Keep that dwarf locked up, he’s an embarrassment.”

 

Bilbo grinned, shouting after her, “Of course, Miss Bracegirdle! Anything you say!”

 

***

 

“My brothers want to meet you. Of course, they’ve wanted to meet you for a while now, but they’re starting to get annoying about it.”

 

Bilbo snorted, setting the table for dinner. He only set two plates, but he’s found, that a lot less hobbits come by when Nori was around, so he wasn’t worried about them being interrupted. “Would you like me to come up to the Blue Mountains? I could do that, of course, it might just be easier for them to come down here. Could they do that?”

 

Nori blinked at his hobbit a few times. He didn’t expect such immediate approval. “I… I could convince them to come down here. You won’t have to deal with so many dwarves. I know we can be a loud bunch.”

 

Bilbo smiled gratefully. “It would be nice. They seem like such good people, from what you say about them.”

 

Nori smiled, “Well, I _am_ quite fond of them.”

 

***

 

Dori and Ori weren’t quite sure what they had been expecting this hobbit to be like, but this was not it.

 

Bilbo was a sweet thing, with a mischievous streak that made the other dwarves see just why Nori had fallen so fast for him. He’d greeted them with open arms and a brilliant smile.

 

This was a big change from the people their brother usually brought home… if he brought them home at all.

 

They liked him, and he obviously brought out a different side to their brother, who couldn’t even look at him without grinning like a fool.

 

There would be no complaints from them.

 

***

 

There might be _some_ complaints from the hobbits.

 

“You can’t marry him, Bilbo.”

 

Bilbo’s heart sank to the bottom of his stomach at the clan matriarchs words. “W-what?”

 

She shook his head disapprovingly. “He never asked me for your hand, Bilbo. I cannot say yes until he follows our customs to ask me.”

 

Bilbo breathed out a sigh of relief, feeling a little like he’d got punched in the gut. His grandmother looked amused, which made Bilbo want to scream a little. “Do not _ever_ do that again. I feared for a moment that I would have to run away to the Blue Mountains to be with him. I love Bag End, I don’t want to leave.”

 

She looked thoughtful for a minute. “But would you?”

 

“Would I what?”

 

She smiled, “Would you run away with him?”

 

Bilbo thought about that too. He hadn’t even realized he’d said that. “I… I think I would. Yes, I would.”

 

She nodded approvingly. “Good. Then, as long as he follows my condition, there should be no more arguments about it.”

 

***

 

At age thirty-seven, Bilbo Baggins could no longer be called a bachelor.

 

Nori’s family, Dori and Ori had been there, and more than half the Shire had come for Bilbo, but otherwise, it was a closed off affair, as far as a party for hobbits could be.

 

***

 

Nori didn’t always stay in the Shire with Bilbo. He left for… business, often.

 

Of course, Bilbo had no qualms about bullying Dori and Ori into taking what money they might need from him, because that’s what _family_ is for, helping out, and Bilbo already had more than he would ever know what to do with.

 

But, for thirteen years, Bilbo Baggins, and Nori of the Brother’s Ri, had the most amazing and peaceful marriage they could have ever wished for, and Nori praised the day he ever decided to stop and listen to a small hobbit cry, instead of taking all his things and leaving.

 

That is, till one day, a wizard stopped by for tea.

**Author's Note:**

> littlesforfandom.tumblr.com


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